Our Chief Judge's Security and Fiscal Responsiobility

“I speak two languages, Body and English.” Mae West

“It is not the state’s place to define marriage in a way that excludes a segment of the population from the legal benefits associated with marriage, and that’s why I’m here today.” Patterson April 16, 2009

“We bishops aren’t into politics, we’re into principles.” Archbishop Timothy Dolan, April 15, 2009

All righty then. Did you see our friend in Kabul Hamid Karzai waded into the divorce debate by the passage of The Shia Personal Status Law affecting the minority Shiite population in Afghanistan? This law requires women to submit to sex even if forced, and requires wives to get permission to leave the home except in an emergency. Wives must wear makeup upon request of the husband, and they can only divorce if the husband cannot feed her or disappears for a really long time. On the other hand, the man can divorce for virtually any reason. As for children, only the father and the grandfather can be awarded custody of a child over the age of seven. I wonder what the child support standards are in Afghanistan for two children. And we thought the New York legislature’s view of domestic relations was backward.
Speaking of Grand Poobahs, I see our former Family Court is getting a nice facelift courtesy of the Office of Court Administration. Twenty years ago the Albany Family Court left its Romanesque digs at Lodge and Pine streets “temporarily” because the building was condemned as unsafe. Lots of fond memories there like the bullet hole they never fixed when Sam Crutchfield shot and killed his wife in the waiting room in 1977. Now our bankrupt state is spending $26 million to buy and renovate one building. Why? So our Chief Judge as well as other out of town judges can stay there instead of patronizing our local hotels. Court of Appeals “spokesman” Gary Spencer says this is “a security issue for us.” Say what? A security issue? Since when do we have to spend over $900 a square foot to build a place for our judges to place their pretty heads while in Albany? An exorbitant cost of such space would be $100 per square foot. The Waldorf Astoria renovated the great Fairmont Hotel New Orleans for $68 per square foot. Besides, is there really a “security issue” for our judges? Is Osama Bin Laden sitting in a Pakistani cave plotting injury to Jonathan Lippman and out of town jurists? I wonder if the Chief Judge’s bodyguard will get to stay there, or his limo driver. Maybe we can dispense with the limo driver since the Family Court building is only 100 feet from the Court of Appeals building. Maybe there is a better use of the $27 million, like judicial pay raises or perhaps replacing the duct tape that graces the rug in the courtroom on the 4th floor of the Albany County Courthouse. I guess not.
So, with a deficit of $16 billion, we can spend $26 million for a few luxury bedrooms for our out of town judges. But what if you want to practice law and don’t pay your student loans? For that, you do not have the requisite character and fitness to practice law. So saith the Third Department, in denying admission to Mr. Anonymous. This guy went to law school, passed the bar and except for his enormous student loans would be practicing law. And just what kind of unfit behavior denied him the pleasure of practicing law? Among other things, not making substantial payments on the loans, and not being “flexible in his discussions with the loan servers.” So, if you want to pass the scrutiny of the Character and Fitness Committee, be sure you are flexible with those pesky loan collectors. After all, fiscal responsibility is a hallmark of fitness to practice.
Here’s a question for you. What is the perfect storm just waiting to swallow up all your money and assets for the rest of your life? Number one, get married. Number two, get your bachelor’s degree, go to medical school, become licensed to practice medicine, get board certified and start a private practice in ophthalmology. Number three, move to New York. Number four, have seven children. Number five, get divorced. Now that guy has “a security issue” if you ask me. Such was the plight of Dr. Michael Mairs when he placed his financial future in the capable hands of the Third Department. The trial court’s award of 15% of the license, degree, and practice was increased from 15% to 25%, reversing the trend downward as shown by the Third Department late last year in Evans (0%) and the Second Department this year in Guha (5%) because of the lack of “meaningful contributions” towards the degree. For good measure, the practice value was increased $86,000 because a loan that had not been repaid in many years was disallowed as a debt. The total net award for the degrees, licenses and practice was approximately $384,000 payable in sixty easy monthly payments of about $6,600 when you add a few years of interest at 4.5% since this case was tried in 2005. The maintenance was increased from $400 per week for seven years to $500 per week for seven years, since the good doctor earned $300,000 and the wife $50,000. As for child support, the trial court’s decision to limit the CSSA percentages above the elusive $80,000 cap was swept aside in favor of the Full Monty of 35% of gross income less FICA less maintenance, for a hefty $71,000 per year. Did I mention that Dr. Mairs was required to pay half the loan taken out by his wife for the eldest child’s college education, plus a $500,000 life insurance policy? So, with his $300k yearly salary, he must pay about $79,000 tax free per year in equitable distribution, $71,000 tax free child support, $26,000 tax deductible maintenance, half of a college loan and life insurance. And by the way, the wife received the home and the right to seek more for college education. So after paying maybe $80,000 in taxes, Dr. Maris can enjoy the remaining $40,000 for his own lifestyle and paying for the remaining kiddies’ college. What’s up, Doc? In his defense, he did get married four years before O’Brien reared its ugly head at the doctors of New York State.
Well, that is about as much fun as one can have for one month. Happy Law Day and Requiscat in Pace Marilyn “99.44% pure” Chambers, Mark The Bird, and Jack Wrangler. We’ll miss you all.